I had a dream...A weird dream... March 9,'10, the day son is shipped to Afghanistan.

Dream:
March 9th 2010 ~ am …

Some small poorish town…
Me, Tracie, Gene, a baby… a man and his girlfriend who was Amber’s mom but acted and resembled Judy Kendall.. Amber was there, too.

Woke up in morning laying in street and I was almost completely under water.gasping for air. a baby next to me, too. The man was sitting on bank like he was contemplating suicide…he was so sad and in deep thought… I asked him where’d all the water came from…He said almost in a smart ass way, like I was dumb, that the river had flooded…

Somehow I ended up in the river and I could not get out…I was being sucked in and could hardly get air… I finally found something to grab onto on the bank…and with all the strength I could muster and great determination, I climbed the bank to safety.

I finally made it to this horrible hug building and saw Tracie there. I knew abt this building from before somehow and I remembered it stunk so badly filth.. Surprisingly, it didn’t seem to stink too much now… someone must have done some cleaning and work there. We were all supposed to draw on this huge paper for the couple – the man and Amber’s sort of mom – cuz it was their anniversary…They had been together for years and years but never married… I started drawing some art on the huge paper as other ladies did, incl. Tracie… I reached down to grab another marker and when I came back up the other ladies had moved the paper so that my art was no longer there and I had no place to draw anymore… I almost got very upset then said oh well. And got up and left the table… I went to another part of the building…a roof outside and saw Tracie sitting there w/ Aiyana… I was feeling very left out and hurt abt her not helping me find a safe place to stay and not seeming to care that I almost drowned. I looked at her and she back at me then she turned away…I wondered why my daughter had turned against me and why didn’t she care abt me anymore? I couldn’t deal with it. I was heartbroken and left that place.

I found another old house which belonged to the couple…it was in dire need of repairs..but it was shelter and I was grateful. They welcomed me w/ food and a place to stay… and I took a shower in a weird bathroom… but felt soooo good to be clean again…it had been days and days since I showered… I was bummed becuz I had to wear my underwear again… Amber was making some play toys for kids at a table and I was very impressed that they were so cool… I told her I could show her many neat things to make once things were settled… I was to have part of the basement as my workroom/gallery…

At some point in the dream I was following Gene and Joe somewhere…seems like thru jungle… I remember thinking how proud I was of son in law, Gene, and thinking we had been close once but that it was all messed up now..He had dissed me so often to his family and I was sooooo hurt that I could never trust or be close again…I thought. I wished it had never happened that way…but it was too late now.

Amber’s mom was wonderful, friendly, happy, cool, and hospitable… Nothing at all like I remember her. She was mean and weird and I thought she treated Amber badly when Amber was a teen… But she had changed and was wonderful..